You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
