we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Randomize
