so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
