so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
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