I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
