I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
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