we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
no. you can't hotbox the world.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Randomize
