She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Randomize
