sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize