I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
