You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
The struggles of a small town man whore
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize