My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Text me some of your sweat
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
