I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
