apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Randomize
