I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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