this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Randomize
