Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Randomize
