Have you finally orgasmed yet?
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Randomize
