we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
