I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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