Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize
