Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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