Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
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