I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
