I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I accidentally burped into my bong.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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