Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Randomize
