Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
