i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
