She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
