His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Randomize
