3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
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