Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
