If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize