i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize