yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
She is in my trunk
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
Randomize
