Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
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