Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
