covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
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