god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Randomize
