thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
