Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
