My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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