this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Randomize
