Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
She even gives head with a lisp.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
