So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
