Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
