dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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