i think i have two assholes
No stitches, just platelets and will power
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize
