just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Randomize
