And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Randomize
