I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
what is it with giant penises always finding me
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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