I hate all girls vehemently.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
It's just like the Real World with babies
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
My penis needs a shock collar
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
