Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
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